Saturday, June 20, 2009

Cowardice

"...someone who isn't afraid to admit (he) misses you
...someone who knows you're not perfect, but treats you as if you are
...someone whose biggest fear is losing you
...someone who gives (his) heart completely
...someone who says, "I love you" and means it"
this is quoted from a text message i received from a friend some weeks ago. while reading and you think of a specific 'someone', that should really mean something, right? like you know well enough because you pay attention. you appreciate because you must've done something good to have that certain someone. then you actually feel lucky, realizing what you have.
though sometimes even when you are aware of what you have, you tend to not treat it the way it's supposed to be treated. it's not that you're ungrateful. sometimes you're just too aware of how great something is that you think you're undeserving. that you might just ruin its greatness along the way.
i don't exactly know how i reached this point. or maybe i do. i just don't want to accept or i just find it hard to accept it. it's unbelievably so true that it's scary. even when i know i should, i'd still choose not to. thinking once i went for it, it's going to start falling apart. that my truths would prove out to be wrong. that my certainties will return to doubts. then i'd start questioning what i was so sure of. some state of mind, huh? insane.
"I had no choice but to hear you
You stated your case time and again
I thought about it
You treat me like I'm a princess
I'm not used to liking that
You ask how my day was
Your love is thick and it swallowed me whole
You're so much braver than I gave you credit for
That's not lip service
You are the bearer of unconditional things
You held your breath and the door for me
Thanks for your patience
What took me so long?
I've never felt this healthy before
I've never wanted something rational
I am aware now
You've already won me over in spite of me
And don't be alarmed if I fall head over feet
Don't be surprised if I love you for all that you are
I couldn't help it
It's all your fault"
SOME THOUGHTS.

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